#2

I'm not happy with you at the moment. And I really don't like being upset with one of the most happiest people on the planet. It's kind of ridiculous.

I was so supportive of your endeavors, but it really looks like it has turned and bitten me in the ass. I told you it was okay to live, as long as you had your priorities straight. And I honestly believe that they are wrong. They are so horribly messed up at the moment, and I just don't know how to get you back on track.

That was my job, was to keep you on track. And part of the reason why I am so upset is because I failed at the job you gave me. That a lot of people knew that I had. You counted on me, and I failed you.

So basically we both kind of suck right now.

I need you. There have been so many times where I've needed you, and it just doesn't seem like you are always there. I've made it through without you, but I thought the point of all of this was that I didn't have to go through it without you.

You know I SERIOUSLY rethought moving out because of that thing. Like, completely and honestly reconsidered. And I almost let you get away with the first thing that has made me completely happy in months. Because I'm really good at pretending to be happy, but I'm really not as happy as it seems.

I almost want to tear up our list. It really doesn't matter. We don't go through it when we see each other anyways. Because we rarely see each other, so we spend our time catching up

Speaking of seeing each other. The real reason I'm upset. Way to ignore my texts. I mean, honestly. A simple no would have sufficed. I just wanted to know times. You didn't have to offer to go if you didn't really want to. And then to not even answer when I try to confirm. Seriously? Who does that. Until we talk about that, we really aren't going to be okay. Because that makes me really mad.

I still love you. With all of my heart. And I still firmly believe that God put us together for a reason. We just need to find that reason again.